11 Signs you aren’t ready to be in a relationship

A lot of us get into a relationship when we are not really ready to be in one, if you identify with any of the following, then you are one of those people.

1. You need a saviour or want to save them
If you are looking for someone who can protect you, fight your battles and not just support you in your tough times but rescue you, you are looking to be dependent on them for your happiness. You need to be strong enough to take care of your issues, bring your happy self into the relationship instead of being a wreck. This goes other way too, when you want to save someone from their troubles, you sympathise with them and want to feel good about yourself by giving them a relationship that can make them happy. These relationships don’t last long, they’re exhausting. We all need to mature about our problems and save ourselves.

2. You are emotionally unavailable

You find the entire idea of sharing your feelings, talking about them or letting a person inside your shell, terrifying. You are not ready to let that wall down, you have to be emotionally available to be in a happy relationship, you should be ready to out your guard down.

3. You are being pressured
This is a common problem faced by many of us who are being forced by their friends and family to be in a relationship, so you are just looking for settling with someone who will show you even the slightest interest, just to get your folks off your back. They might even try to fix you with suitable matches, but you don’t feel the same way about them.

4. You are looking for perfection

If you start a relationship, thinking and expecting a person to be a real life version of the fairytale you have in your head then you will end up being disappointed, every time. There is no such thing as a Prince/Princess charming, how can we expect someone to be perfect when we have flaws ourselves. So, when you are prepared to make certain compromises and accept their flaws, then only you are ready to be in a relationship.

5. You have a hard time trusting people
It may be because of a bitter past experience or you were just born this way, but trust it THE most vital component of a relationship, you cannot expect to have a healthy relationship if you have a hard time trusting your partner and you drive yourself crazy by constantly thinking of where they might be, what if they’re cheating, keep checking their personal stuff every chance you get, want to own a lie-detector machine, then you need to work on yourself first, maybe even seek professional help, do whatever it takes to get rid of this toxic habit.

6. You are focusing on yourself

You are on the stage where you are discovering your capabilities, stretching out your limits, testing yourself and setting out new challenges. You are your own center of attention, this is a good time to build yourself up. You don’t want to slow down and think that a relationship will only weigh down your flight. You are in a relationship with yourself.

7. You think relationships are too dramatic
When you hear your friends talk about their relationship problems, you thank God that you’re single and walk out of there feeling happy and satisfied with your life, then you are not ready to take the bad that comes with the good of a relationship. You think they are too demanding and you are just not ready to keep up with those demands and compromises.

8. You are not ready to give up on the partying lifestyle

You live alone and you like to party alone, you like to go out almost every night and there are no time limits or restraints, you might even bring back people for the night and you find the idea of giving up your wild lifestyle abominable.

9. You only like the dating period of a relationship
You are a sucker for the initial months of a relationship, when you’re just getting to know the person, going out of romantic dates etc but as soon as the infatuation starts to wear off, so does your interest in the other person and you’re back swiping your fingers on Tinder, you’re definitely not prepared for a commitment you are a ‘serial dater’.

10. You’re not ready to share your life

It’s a given in a relationship, that you two have to share your life with each other and adjust your schedules to make time for the relationship. If you are too busy, not ready to make amends in your routine or you’re too independent and don’t like the idea of having to inform your partner about your sudden plans, you feel like you own your life and aren’t ready to let someone be a part of it, you can’t even think of sharing your bed with someone then you shouldn’t be leading someone on and giving them hopes.

11. You’re still not over your ex
If you are still Facebook stalking your ex, your gallery is full of their Instagram posts, you find yourself remembering the happy times you shared with them, you ‘miss’ them; then this is a blazing sign that you’re not ready to be in  a relationship. You need to get rid of the past baggage to make room for a new relationship.

Also, you may want to get in a relationship, just to distract yourself from the previous heartbreak, you need to understand that you are not being fair to the other person involved, unless they are okay to be your rebound.

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