The beginning of a relationship is such an amazing period. Everyone loves the honeymoon phase. You wish it’d never end. But like all good things (in this case, an exceptionally good thing), it must come to an end. It is only then that you shift your focus on grave matters like the potential future of the relationship. You start noticing the differences you two might have, and if you can accept them and live with them harmoniously. You realize that you can’t change them entirely or even yourself. There are always going to be certain things over which you won’t see eye to eye.
Then how do you decide if the two of you are compatible or not. Will the differences sabotage the relationship or will they allow it to last?
While both of you want to be together, the idea of ‘together’ might be different. One of you wants to get married while the other one doesn’t find it necessary. This obviously comes up later on in a relationship. And if the two of you have contrasting views, you might be taken aback with what your partner has to say.
This could be a deal breaker, if neither of you are willing to compromise. It wouldn’t be a good idea to go on with the relationship hoping that one of you might change their mind, because it is uncertain. If you don’t share the same idea for the future of your relationship, then you will never be able to find content in your relationship.
The frequency of arguments
Every couple argues. Some more than others. It’s better to avoid topics that are not as important and you know for sure that the two of you have conflicting views. It’s never a good idea to not settle a dispute and just ignore it, because it’s going to turn up again, sooner or later. But if it seems that all you ever do is argue, and that too to no end, then maybe it’s time to make some changes.
Partners ought to look out for each other and also be each other’s strength. They should enable each other to achieve whatever it is they strive for. And it’s alright to have entirely diverse aims, as long as they don’t disrupt your relationship. There are many instances where one person has to travel a lot and the other one feels stuck and helpless having to wait to see them. You can’t ask your partner to give up what they do, because it makes them the person they are. If you’re in a similar situation and are willing to make your peace with it, then you’ll have no trouble. But if you’re not happy with this arrangement, maybe you should consider your options.
Sexual compatibility doesn’t solely pertain to how good the two of you are in bed or whether you both find each other satisfying. It goes on to include your opinions about the importance of physical intimacy in a relationship. The things you like. And also the things you’d want your partner to do.
If you have similar views, it’s all good. But if there are different views, it might not be a problem initially but may go on to be troublesome later. There might be things that you like but your partner is not comfortable with or vice versa. This could lead to friction which you might or might not be able to control.
The question of children
Just because you see your partner smiling at and adoring a child, doesn’t necessarily mean they’d want kids of their own some day. This is something you need to discuss with them. Many of us usually are in agreement to whether we want children or not. But there are couples who cannot reach a decision because one of them wants kids and the other doesn’t. You should know where your partner stands on this issue, and whether they are open to changing their mind. But if you two can’t reach an agreement and you realize that this isn’t one of those things that is just going to blow over with time, you need to make a decision regarding the relationship
One of you might not be very expressive when it comes to sentiments and they tend to keep to themselves. While the other one is more expressive. As long as both the partners accept this difference, there are no conflicts. But if they start to feel that the relationship is not fulfilling emotionally, that’s when the troubles begin. Even though neither of you changes, but you fail to tolerate the differences anymore.
You might be on different education levels and have different interests. But despite your differences you should be able to understand each other. Conversations between you two should come naturally. And you two should feel intellectually challenged by each other, not to an unhealthy extent of course. But if you find your conversations boring or you two fail to understand each other, it could become very frustrating.
Compatibility comes from tolerance. As long as two people find their differences tolerable, they will be compatible. But as soon as they decide that they can no longer put up with each other, then the worst is inevitable. If there is love, you will always find tolerance in you.
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