You met this person, got to know them better and realized that they’re the perfect catch! They have a nice job, dress up pretty well and are incredibly caring towards everyone around them. But the truth is, no matter how hard you try to be happy with them or try to convince yourself that you’ve found an amazing partner, you know in your heart that you’re just not that into them. In all this time that you’ve stayed together, you’ve never once felt an uncontrollable desire for them, and you never even felt that spark, the one that all the movies and books keep talking about.
If you’re unsure about your feelings towards the person you’re dating, the following points can help reaffirm that he/she is not the one for you.
You can’t help but feel a little annoyed when your cell phone beeps and it’s a text from them
Getting a text from a person you really like actually has the potential to brighten up your day, so you wonder what the problem is when every text from your current partner just makes you roll your eyes and feel a bit annoyed.
You cancel plans at the last minute without any actual reason
You feel bad saying no to them when they ask you out on a date but what makes you feel even worse is the thought of actually going out with them when the time comes. So you make up some lame excuse about how you just got called in for work or about how you just need some rest right now because of the terrible headache you have since the morning.
You don’t find them funny
When they make a joke, all you can offer in return is a pitiful smile or a small laugh that can barely even be classified as an actual laugh. There are very few occasions where you even understand the joke they’re trying to make and you feel like you just don’t get their sense of humor.
You keep trying to convince yourself about how much you like them
You feel like you’re always trying to persuade yourself that you like this person. You try noting down all of their good attributes so you can remind yourself time and again about what a good husband/wife they can be, or about how they are the sane and rational choice for you even if they’re not the most desirable one.
When someone asks you to describe them, the best you can come up with are words like ‘nice’ or ‘friendly’
If you actually liked this person and someone asked you to describe them, you would have a detailed speech ready at all times about what kind of personality they have, about all their cute little habits you can’t get enough of and even some of the bad ones that you’ve grown to gradually love and adore.
You’ve never felt the need to talk about them endlessly with your friends
You just don’t really have much to say about them. You don’t have any exciting stories to tell your friends, stories about the kind of moments that make your heart skip a beat or the times you felt so attracted to them that you got butterflies in your stomach every time you met them.
You feel guilty when they do something extra special for you
Remember that time they surprised you with this extremely expensive watch you had wanted for so long? Or the time they arranged the most amazing party for your birthday with all of your closest friends? You should remember these moments as some of the happiest times of your relationship but every time you think of them, you can’t help but be left with this weird feeling in your heart, with this guilt about the fact that maybe you don’t deserve this much, and about the fact that you might never be able to reciprocate this thoughtfulness.
The thought of being intimate with them is less than pleasant for you
You always knew that the physical attraction you feel towards your partner was somewhat mild, but lately you have actually started resenting the times when you’re about to get extremely intimate. This intimacy feels unwanted and frankly, a bit awkward at times.
You throw pointless tantrums in the hope that they’ll end it first
This is the final sign that it’s high time to stop putting yourself and your partner through unnecessary emotional torture. If you find yourself constantly trying to provoke your partner to a limit where they’ll just give up and break up with you, then you definitely have very little/no interest in this relationship. So stop acting like this, stop forcing yourself to like someone you obviously don’t and muster up the courage to end this relationship yourself.
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