When you start to fall in love with someone, when you begin to imagine a future with them, and when the only thing that makes you smile anymore is knowing that you have someone as amazing as them in your life- that’s the point when your judgment starts to get a bit clouded and when all rationality and logic is usually thrown out the window.
You stop thinking about things practically and all that matters to you at this point is how much you love the person standing in front of you. This is why you sometimes fail to acknowledge some of the subtle and even some of the very obvious problems that might come up once the honeymoon period of the relationship is over.
And we are here to save you from just that! Here is a list of 11 things that can help you judge if the guy you’re with is actually worth all your time and efforts or whether it’s time to just say goodbye:
He truly respects you
If your relationship isn’t based on the foundation of mutual respect, how long do you really think it can last? And by respect, I don’t mean that he just talks about you in an admirable way while speaking offensively about most other girls. Either he respects all women or he doesn’t! Be with a guy who respects you for the way you dress, for the opinions you have, for the emotions you feel and for the way you decide to live your life.
He is never violent
We all get angry at times. We all have our bad days. And we all end up doing or saying things that we don’t really mean at one point or the other. But no matter how angry he is, no matter how rough his day went, and no matter how big the argument was, it will never be okay for him to be violent with you in any way. Watch closely how he treats the women in his life, from his mother to his sisters to his female friends. It can tell you a lot about the way he will treat you as well.
And if he ever gets rough with you, don’t shrug it off by assuming it was a one-time thing or hoping that it will just stop with time. This probably wasn’t the first time he acted this way and it definitely won’t be the last. You need a man who is gentle with you, a man who truly knows your worth, and a man who loves you so deeply that it encourages you to stand up to and confront any other violent people in your life.
He can make you laugh
Every girl needs to be with a guy who can make her laugh. I’m not saying that he has to be the funniest guy in the room at all times, or that he should always have a joke up his sleeve for anyone who asks. But if he can make you laugh at the silliest of things, if he can cheer you up in the darkest of times, and if he is the one person you can really have fun with, then he’s definitely a keeper. After some time, his good looks will fade away, the sex will get boring, and the excitement level will go down, but one thing that will always stay is the way he can make you laugh!
He is kind
We’ve all fallen for the bad guy at least once- the guy who’s always acting indifferent, the guy who is constantly surrounded by unnecessary mystery, and the guy who makes us feel insecure and uncertain about where the relationship is even going. But one lesson that guy has left me with is the fact that life is just too short to be with someone like him, to wait around for him to change one day, and to keep yourself in a constant state of misery while trying to get some attention from his side.
If you’ve found a guy who is the complete opposite of this, someone who is actually kind to you in every way possible, then hold on to him for as long as you can. A guy who is kind will actually show you how it feels to be loved, and how it feels to witness true happiness in a relationship.
He is hardworking
It doesn’t matter if he owns the latest iPhone or if he has the fanciest car or the biggest house possible. What truly matters is how hardworking he is to actually earn the luxuries he wants in life, to get to a place where he can make himself and the people around him proud, and to keep achieving bigger and better things along the road.
And his hard-work shouldn’t just be limited to his professional life. Make sure he is just as hard-working in his relationships as well. Because with all the drama, arguments, and rough times that are bound to enter any long-term relationship, you’ll need someone exactly like that to make things work.
He is motivated and driven
While hard-work is definitely a requirement to be successful in life, it is sometimes not a sufficient one. Because hard work can also be placed in things that are not meaningful and things that won’t really take you anywhere in life. The real formula towards success is to be hard-working and to stay motivated towards achieving things that truly matter.
If you have found a man who is hard-working, driven, and motivated towards the right things, then hold on to this one. Not only does this guy have the potential to reach the skies, he will also inspire you to reach out for bigger and better things in life.
He is generous
One main requirement that most girls have is to find a guy who is rich, a guy who can fulfill all their wants and needs, and a guy who can really take care of them. But can you really equate his money with the amount of care and affection he will have for you? Do you really want a man who has all the riches in the world but is cheap at heart? Stop looking at his pocket. And start noticing how generous he is in life. Does he keep all his wealth to himself or does he share it with people who aren’t as fortunate as him?
Does he always keep your needs above his own? Does he take out time generously just to be with you more often? If the answer to these questions is a yes, then this guy is definitely someone you should hold on to.
He is supportive
If you want to spend your entire life with someone, it should be with a guy who is right there with you in the good times AND the bad, someone who can hold your hand when everyone else is long gone, someone who makes you believe in your potential in the times when you’ve stopped believing in yourself, someone who understands the goals and dreams you have set in life and is willing to do everything in his power to help you achieve them.
He has seen your worst and still loves you
We all have a dark side to us- a side where we hide all the negativity, the pain, and the distress we have faced in life, a side that comes out every once in a while at a time when you least expect it, a side that not many people can handle. And if your partner has had the chance to explore that side, to take a ride towards the darkest places inside your mind, and if he was able to actually handle all of it, to stick by you, and to keep loving you the way he always did, then make sure you stick by him no matter what.
You like his family
The truth is when you decide to marry someone, you’re not just agreeing to a life-long relationship with them but also a life-long relationship with their entire family or at least the people they’re really close to. Even if you don’t have to meet them every week of the year, you will still have to see them on holidays, special weekends, birthdays and other annoying family get-togethers. So it’s extremely important that you like their family, and form a genuine connection with them. And the opposite applies here as well- they need to get along with your family too.
You love him
Read the above statement carefully. I’m talking about love, and not lust, infatuation, or a temporary obsession which can sometimes be mistaken as feelings of love when you’re in the honeymoon period, and when your feelings of passion and excitement are beyond your control. If you want to spend your entire life with someone, make sure you actually love THEM and not just the feeling of ‘being in love’. Love is what will keep this relationship going even when the passion has died down. Love is what will help you compromise to keep moving forward even in the most horrible fights. And love is what will motivate you to always keep your partner happy.
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