How many of these mistakes are you guilty of?
Relationships are never as easy as they make it out to be in the movies or in the fairytales. It’s not always going to be smooth roads and comfortable rides. There will be a lot of speed bumps.
There will be a lot of ups and downs. The reason why that’s the case is because relationships will always be inherently imperfect. And the reason that relationships are inherently imperfect is because all human beings are imperfect. All human beings are flawed. All human beings are going to make mistakes and screw up eventually.
The key to preserving longevity in relationships is to minimize mistakes as much as possible. However, these mistakes are inevitable, and the best kinds of relationships are those that are able to endure these mistakes and learn from them. The best way to improve the chances of your relationship not falling over a cliff is to be aware of the common mistakes that people make in relationships.
Once you are aware of these common mistakes, it would be best for you to avoid them the best way that you can. Knowledge is power in this situation. The sooner you know that you’re doing something wrong, then the sooner you can work on trying to remedy yourself. Here are some common mistakes that you are prone to making when you enter a new relationship.
1. You always ditch your friends in favor of your new partner.
It’s never healthy to isolate yourself from the people who matter the most to you in life. Of course, granted, in relationships, you will be alone with your partner most of the time. It’s what’s going to separate you from being mere friends or acquaintances. But that shouldn’t mean that you completely cut yourself off from other parts of your social circle.
2. You compare your relationship to other peoples’ relationships.
Comparisons are never healthy in relationships. Each relationship will always be distinct and unique because of the complexity of personalities involved. That’s why it makes absolutely no sense for people to be comparing their relationships with others. Another important mistake related to this would be to compare your current partner with your ex.
3. You try to control the relationship too much.
Relationships aren’t supposed to be controlled or manipulated. Relationships are too complex for human beings to completely have full control over. When you try to become too controlling in a relationship, you may be bringing a huge bulk of stress upon yourselves as a couple. This stress is unnecessary and it can be very destructive to any relationship.
4. You avoid having difficult discussions with each other.
You don’t like talking about the big things. You don’t like to have the important arguments with each other. You don’t like planning for the future because it intimidates you. That’s a big problem right there. As a couple, you can’t just choose to ignore the difficult parts of life. You have to face them head on and hope that everything turns out for the best.
5. You don’t maintain open lines of communication with one another.
Communication is important in every relationship. When you are closing yourselves off from one another, then the relationship is doomed. You have to create a space in your relationship wherein both of you can be pen and honest to each other without fear of being judged.
6. You have trouble being sensitive and patient with each other.
Sensitivity and patience are very important when it comes to preserving a relationship. Human beings are very complex entities. Sometimes, it can be difficult for us to understand where other people are coming from. It can be hard for us to connect with some people on an emotional level sometimes. That’s why we must always be sensitive and patient in a relationship. We can’t automatically hate someone just because we don’t understand them well.
7. You don’t value respect in the relationship.
No relationship on the face of this earth, whether romantic or not, has ever survived without respect. People must always learn to respect one another if they are to have a relationship together. You can’t expect to be belittling and demeaning your partner every chance you get without suffering a broken relationship in the end.
8. You love the relationship, but not the person.
You are in a relationship with a person, not an idea. You have to get to know the person. Understand what makes that person tick. Accept that that person is going to have flaws and vulnerabilities. Know that that person isn’t an idea or a fantasy. This relationship is real, raw, and imperfect; and you’re going to have to accept and love all parts of it.
9. You become too territorial and possessive.
You can’t afford to be overly territorial in a relationship. You can’t be treating your partner like a prized possession. Your partner is a human being who is entitled to principles of individuality and freedom. You can’t treat your partner like something you own; like an object that you are unwilling to share with others.
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